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How To Be A Badass

December 2, 2015 By Kim

badass

So…you want to be a Badass do you?  Well, here’s my special guide to being the biggest Badass on the block.  You’re welcome.

  • Shamelessly build your empire.  And by empire, what I mean to say is build your life. Stop downplaying your accomplishments.  Your accomplishments and experiences are what make you a Badass.
  • Once a day, look in the mirror and simply say “I’m awesome” because you are. Be grateful for your awesomeness.  Being awesome is enough.
  • Fearlessly pursue excellence. Pursue it in yourself, and in your relationships. Expect it from your children. And by excellence, what I mean to say is put some goddamn effort into your day. People often rise to the height of the bar, so set it high for yourself and others, and don’t apologize.
  • Say yes to what frightens you. It’s okay to be afraid.  The thing you fear? Do it anyway. Engage, and stop being afraid to fail. Everyone fails.  Remember, people do respect the attempt.
  • Free your competitive side.  Let her out.  She’s an okay gal, and it’s just fine for you to be friends with her.  Your competitive side is a true Badass.  You’re allowed to want more for yourself – to do better, be better, and live better.
  • Drop an F-Bomb once in a while.  It’s not creative, but it does add some flavor to what you are trying to say.  Know when to do it.
  • Read everything you can so you know what the hell you are talking about.  Stop being uninformed.  Stop being naive.  Don’t offer your opinion if you haven’t done your research because you will be devoured by those who have.
  • Drive your own bus and beat your own drum.  You’re the only one you have to sleep with every night, so you need to be in charge of your own life.  Wear a whistle around your neck if you have to.
  • Own your mistakes, but please stop apologizing.  One heartfelt apology is enough.  After you have delivered your apology, move on.  Most people have very little to be sorry about but apologize incessantly because of insecurities or to avoid confrontation.
  • Possible is what possible does.  If you are a true Badass, anything is fucking possible. See how beautifully placed that F-Bomb was?  And “can’t” is not a fucking option.
  • If you dream it, take the required small steps to achieve it.  No one ever achieves anything in one fell swoop. Big doings and big changes are never, ever easy or fast. Dream it, do it slowly, and then write a book about it.
  • Confidence comes from knowledge, and doing something well. Doing something well takes practice.  A Badass doesn’t expect to do anything well without knowledge or practice.
  • Accept yourself.  Then accept everyone else and all their skewed opinions and ideals. Kindly nod at them.  God bless them unless they are haters.  If they are haters, cut them off.  A Badass does not put up with hate.
  • When it comes to people, even the ornery ones, be like honeysuckle – distinctively inviting and sweet.  Know that it’s important to be mannered, kind, classy, and hospitable.  A Badass occasionally drops an F-Bomb, but she usually takes the high road.
  • Cheer for yourself, but be on everyone’s team.  It’s easier than it sounds.  I find that runner’s, in general, are very good at this.
  • A Badass speaks the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.  Truth telling will lead you directly to your authentic self.
  • Choosing to be a good person everyday is as Badass as it gets.  And yes, it’s always a choice.
  • Make Asanas part of your Badass being. Just breathe and let go of any emotional baggage that keeps you from elevating your life.  A Badass is indeed a humble warrior.
  • Choose your own personal power anthem and play that shit wherever you go. Play it when you run.  Play it when you are in the shower.  Play it when you are cooking or cleaning the house. Let it jack you up. My Badass anthem is “One Tree Hill” by U2.  I feel like I can do anything with that song playing.
  • Make sure you have a Game Face, a Poker Face, and a Brave Face.  And never cut off your nose to spite it.   
  • When all else fails throw on a pair of retro sunglasses and some low, black boots and simply pretend.  Pop your collar and wear ridiculous red lipstick. If you can’t muster up what it takes to be a Badass, at least you can look like one.
  • And one final thing:  Do wear the cobalt-blue floor length gown to a formal party. No one else will.  Others will be off in corners, bleating like sheep in a different version of the same little black dress. Saunter in like you own the place, sing your best karaoke version of You’re No Good by Linda Rondstadt, then drop the mic and exit stage left.  A Badass always leaves them guessing and wanting more.  As in, who the hell was that Badass?!
 And yes, to answer your questions, Badass is spelled with a capital B and it’s one word.

Filed Under: funny, guides, happy, life, satire, true self Tagged With: Badass, happy, life, self, self care, self esteem

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About Kim

I am a poet, a writer, an over-the-top mischief maker, a trash talker, and an old school dirty bird. I will never (ever) say no to a properly aerated glass of Malbec on a Friday night. I use words like “feminist” and “sartorial” and “no” and actively flirt with a decline in readership whenever I put them all into one, cohesive sentence. I like mountain biking, trails, succulents, books, inspirational quotes and vivid dreams. I strive to live with a grateful, open heart. What I know to be true is that there is always time for personal reflection and change. It's never too late to grow new wings and learn to fly again. Namaste!

My essays and poetry can also be found at Rebelle Society, The Elephant Journal, The Manifest-Station, The Minds Journal, The Imperfect Parent, Scary Mommy, BonBon Break, Litchfield Magazine, The Block Island Times, and Today's Mama.

Copyright © 2025 · Kim Valzania, Eat, Pray, Post[